Bedtime

I've been away the past couple of days on assignment. And, every night, as i struggled to sleep in that impersonal double bed, I think of Laila.

I imagine her snuggled close to me, her head resting on my right arm. I imagine smelling her hair while strands tickle my nostrils a bit. Then she'd wrap both her arms around my neck, snuggle even closer and whisper her breathy whisper 'Mummy ahyabyoo.'

She does that every night. Melts my heart everytime.

Thoughts like that keep me sane when I'm away. It's no toruble being on a business trip during the day. You're always busy and work keeps you from thinking of anything else. But when everything's done for the day and there's nothing left to do but sleep, then the fact of being alone finally hits you.

It's hardest the first time you lie down on the bed and the cold sheets embrace you. The clock ticks by slowly. The minutes seem like hours. Then you realize that it's been over an hour since you first laid down. Sleep is elusive. And, when it finally comes, is light and easily interrupted.

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When I got home, I thought Laila would be asleep. She was not. She was inside the room with Daddy.

She bolted from the room and flung herself at me, arms stretched out calling out 'Mummy! Mummy!' She embraced me tightly and insisted to be carried. Ahh, the things we live for.

It's been two nights since I got back. Laila and I are back to our nighttime routine.